Not Alone
by M. Louise E
Summary: It is the Fourth Of July and Everyone is gathered at a cookout at Hank Voight's house ready to watch some fireworks. The display brings back memories of the war for Jay as he hears the fireworks, sees the lights and smells the smoke. Jay PTSD goes on display and his co-workers and friends help out.


**Title: Chicago PD : Not Alone**

**Summary: It is the Fourth Of July and Everyone is gathered at a cookout at Hank Voight's house ready to watch some fireworks. The display brings back memories of the war for Jay as he hears the fireworks, sees the lights and smells the smoke. Jay PTSD goes on display and his co-workers and friends help out. **

**Disclaimers: The show is property of Dick Wolfe, and NBC. I don't own anything. Just borrowing the characters to practice my writing. **

**A/N: As I was watching fireworks on the Fourth this idea came into my mind. Please enjoy. Mistakes are mine. I don't know much about PTSD just from things on the net. Well Enjoy. **

For the Fourth Of July Hank Voight had his Intelligence Unit and some of the Firehouse Fifty-One firefighters as well, at his house for a cookout and a fireworks display. Everyone is gathered in the back yard to see some fireworks.

Erin is sitting on a blanket with Kelly Severide who has his one arm loosely around Erin. Leslie Shay is with the two. Adam Ruzek is sitting with Kim Burgess talking and waiting for the display to soon begin. Alvin Olinsky is sitting with his daughter Lexi as they both wait. Antonio Dawson and his family aren't their since they are with their families for the fourth.

Trudy Platt is sitting with Randy "Mouch" McHolland on their own blanket holding hands and waiting. They met at Chief Wallace Boden's wedding and the two were getting to know one another. It is so cute.

Jay Halstead is sitting by himself. He feels like someone is watching him. He turns his head to look around and sees his Partner and friend Erin. He smiles at her and she smiles back at him and waves.

Kelly glances at him and nods his head. Jay nods back. A little understanding between Kelly and Jay. It means, She is with me and you better step away. It is getting darker and soon the display will begin.

BOOM! BOOM! BOOM!

The fireworks have started. With the high pitched whistle of the fireworks going up in the air and the loud explosions going off and the bright lights as everyone is making delighted sounds as they see the display high in the sky. It is a beautiful. Everyone is enjoying them. All but one.

Jay Halstead is back in Afghanistan during his tour of duty. Memories come flooding back. The lights of the fireworks reminding him of the firing of weapons, the sounds reminding him of gunfire, the smoke from the fireworks that isn't strong but it is still there reminds him of the aftermath of the carnage inflicted.

This has caught Jay off guard. Fireworks are one of the triggers of his PTSD. He hasn't had an attack in awhile but than he hasn't seen fireworks in awhile. The memories come flooding back and he is trapped and acting out. No one notices what is happening to Jay as they watch the loud booming fireworks.

_Jay Halstead just shot and killed two leaders of the terrorist group that he has been given to target and take out. He is on a rooftop in a city that is in Afghanistan. He is in his army fatigues. The rest of his team are scattered about in the town. Keeping tabs on the Taliban in the city and to guard their Army Ranger Jay Halstead. _

_Through is rifle scope, Jay sees a group gathered around the two bodies of the men he just took out. The very young son of the one leader is crying for his father who is now dead. He backs away before he is spotted but it is to late. Gunfire is now heard being fired around himself. He runs and goes the way he came up. _

_He joins his group and they make a getaway through the open market place but the Taliban have other ideas. They surround the market place and fire their rifles at the American Army. _

_They don't care if they take out innocent people along with the Army. Jay is hidden and has his rifle set up. He is taking the terror group out one by one. One of the other team have radioed for backup. It will be awhile before the team can get there. _

_The young son of one of the leaders, the one that Jay seen crying for his father has a bomb strapped to his chest and holding the detonator steps out into the middle of the market place of the town ready to kill everyone within the vicinity of where he is at. He is yelling in his language but Jay understands. The boy is yelling; "You killed my father and you will pay." _

_Jay's hands are shaking badly as he tries to line up a kill sight on the boy. I can't do this but I must. I need to find the strength to pull the trigger. He is only a boy! Jay is thinking. A boy raised to already hate and to kill that learned well with the family he is raised in. He is only doing what he is taught by his parents. In his case his parents are dead wrong. _

_The boy's mother runs up to her son and grabs him crying. She doesn't want this. She was forced to marry at a young age by her father. She doesn't want to lose the only family she has left. The mother is screaming and crying. _

_Sweat is running down Jay's face. His emotions are locked away now. He has to do this or everyone dies if the boy pushes the button to set off the bomb. His hands are study now. He lines up the rifle looks through the scope and sees the mother with her son. He has to take it. Even if it means killing the mother along with the boy. _

_The rifle is pointed at it's target. The trigger is squeezed and the bullet is fired and races through the barrel toward its intended target. As if in slow motion the bullet races forward and hit's the boy. The mother at the last minute is pulled away from her son by her other children. She is okay. _

_However the son in front of her falls to the ground dead. The bomb is un-detonated. The backup team have gotten to the city and help their teammates'. The mother is crying for her lost husband and son. The bomb is taken care of by the bomb squad guy for the Army. It won't go off now. _

_The terror group is taken care of and Jay and the rest of the team rush to the helicopters and head back to base. Jay is sitting in his seat a hard look on his face at having done what he did. One of his team pat him on his back and nods at what he did. Jay nods back. He can't speak of what he did until now…_

Alvin Olinsky, happens to look back at Jay and sees what is happening to his co-worker and young friend. He stands up and goes back to where Jay is at. "Jay snap out of it!" Alvin shouts loud enough for Jay to hear. Erin watches as Alvin got up and heads toward Jay. She wonders what is happening.

Jay comes out of his memories shaking and trembling. Tears are silently running down his face. "It's okay kid." Alvin tells the young man, his arm around Jay's shoulders. He understands what Jay is going through, having been in the armed forces himself.

Alvin helps Jay to stand and helps lead him into Hank's house. Away from the noise of the fireworks still going on. Kelly Severide and Leslie Shay follow Erin inside to see what is going on.

Hank Voight heads in also. Alvin leads Jay to a chair in the living room, and Jay takes a seat. Horrified and humiliated are the feeling that rush to the surface in Jay's mind. Alvin sits on the side of the chair next to Jay patting his shoulder to give comfort.

Leslie Shay is concerned at what she is seeing checks his pulse in his wrist and takes in at how he looks. Shaken up. Jay has his face covered as he cries. Erin kneels in front of Jay and pulls him toward her shoulder and rubs his back. She just wants to help her partner and friend through with what he just experienced. To give him support.

Kelly Severide steps into the room and joins the group. He guessed what happened with Jay. He saw his former Squad member and now Lieutenant of another firehouse Jeff Clarke have and episode of PTSD while on the job.

Jay shoulders shake with silent sobs as he cries and mourns the death of the child he had to kill. Everyone just waits with him. Hank watches from the entryway of the living room his arms crossed over his chest.

Jay slowly calms down and sits up and tissues are handed to him as he blows his nose and wipes at the tears still falling. Erin looks at him with such compassion as he begins to share.

"I'm sorry for disturbing the fireworks. It's just that it brought back painful memories of when I was and Army Ranger in Afghanistan. On this one mission I…I had to take out two leaders of a terror group and I…" Jay stops visibly upset with telling the story. He takes a deep breath and goes on, "I had to shoot the child of the man I just killed. I…I had no choice. He strapped a bomb to himself and he was going to blow himself up along with a bunch of innocent people." Jay covers his face with his hands. Unable to shake the strong memory that he relived.

It is a haunting one. Hank's gruff voice echoes in the living room, "It's okay. It isn't your fault. No one blames you. You had to do what you had to do. You had to protect the others." Hank steps in front of Jay and bends his knees and looks him in his eyes. Hank understands perfectly. In the past he had to do what he had to, to protect the ones he loves. Sometimes his motives were called into question but his heart is in the right place.

Jay sniffs and nods his head. Kelly Severide copies Jeff Clarke's number down and hands Jay the paper with the number on it. "If you need to talk to someone, talk to him. He understands and knows." Kelly tells Jay. "Thanks." Jay tells Severide.

Leslie gives Jay a bottled water and hands it to Jay and gives him a hug and a kiss on his cheek. "You're not alone. You've got friends." Leslie tells Jay.

Jay opens the bottled water and takes a sip. He stands up and Erin pulls him into a hug. "I'm here for you partner. You're one of my best friends. If you need anything I'm here for you. If you need to talk I'll listen." Erin tells Jay her husky voice a comfort to Jay.

"Thanks. Everyone." Jay looks at everyone in the room. Alvin, Hank, Erin, Kelly, and Leslie. They all understood the sacrifice of what Jay had to do. They stand by him and are with him in the times he needs help. That freedom has a price and that it isn't free.

Everyone goes back outside except Jay who stays inside along with Alvin. The older man knows that Jay isn't quite back to feeling normal yet so he stays with him for a bit.

Jay is grateful for all the support he has. He has a small smile on his face. His friends have his back.

The End


End file.
